9 months!

I can't believe Rocco is 9 months old already.  9 months of pregnancy felt like an eternity.  This time has passed so quickly.  As much as I love the surprises and milestones each day brings, it makes me sad that my baby isn't such a baby anymore.
Rocco is 23 pounds and 30 inches long.
The pediatrician said he is right on target developmentally and growing beautifully.

Not feeling the finger prick

He has 7 teeth.
He is waving and pointing at everything.  He eats three solid meals.  He seems to have his fathers appetite but is a picky eater like his mama.

He wants to drink from a cup but isn't really there yet

He pulls himself to stand and will walk holding onto the couch or coffee table.
Rocco continues to sleep through the night with an occasional rough night due to a new tooth.
Mama is getting ready to plan a 1st birthday for her little guy.  It is hard to believe.
Thanks for checking in with everyones favorite little monkey.

Rocco's First Christmas and Other Holiday Ramblings

Eric and I would like to thank everyone who made Rocco's first Chirstmas a special one.  He had no idea what was going on.  To him everyday is an adventure filled with new people and places.  But it was memorable for us.

We considered this our 'free' year.  Since Rocco is too young to comprehend the holiday Eric and I did not put up a tree or buy him a ton of gifts.  We know we have many years ahead of decorating and gift giving.  Which leads us to ponder this - how do we raise a child who understands what Christmas is about, enjoys the holiday, but does not see it as an opportunity to get EVERYTHING his little heart desires?

Rocco loved Santa.  He sat on Santa's lap at the mall, something Eric and I felt we had to do.  He did not cry and the overpriced photo came out pretty cute.  We went to a party on Christmas Eve where Santa came for a visit.  Rocco waved at him like they were long lost friends.  It was pretty cute.  But DAMN!  This could be bad.

I know a woman whom I have great respect for.  She has two children who are quite a few years apart in age.  She told me that her son was raised believing in Santa Claus but that on Christmas morning he knew that the gifts under the tree were from her and her husband.  As a result she says he is appreciative.  He understands that everything he is given on Christmas his parents have worked hard for.  He has gratitude and he is not greedy.  Her daughter has a different father and she claims that her in-laws have shoved Santa down her daughters throat.  Her daughter does not have the same gratitude her son has.  She presents a long list of wants from Santa and will not hesitate to say she does not like something.

Everyone I know who has children ran around like crazy spending, spending, spending the month before Chirstmas.  Every conversation I overheard was about holiday shopping.  Children don't just want a Barbie doll or a football anymore.  They want Ipods.  They want televisions. Wii's.  Laptops. They want items made for adults.  Items that will end up crusted in cereal and boogers.  Items that cost money and are expensive to repair.

How do I raise a son who does not want Ipods and cell phones?  One answer is to not allow him to watch television. (That is another blog topic all together.) I have also been told that kids want what their friends have.  (Which means Rocco can't have friends who watch television.)  I just can't help but think that parents have some responsibility in this as well.  

Stories and songs about Christmas indicate that Santa brought ONE gift to each child. The song "Jolly Old Saint Nicholas" says that "Johnnie wants a pair of skates. Susy wants a dolly.   Nelli wants a story book.  She thinks dolls are folly".  Eric and I have played with the idea of teaching this to Rocco.  He may ask Santa for one thing.  The rest of his gift will come from us, this grandparents, and friends.  Maybe this will keep him from thinking that toys magically appear on the living room floor.  We still have time to think about this.  But we need to do something to keep the greed under control.

While I am not a religious person I do want Rocco to understand the 'true meaning of Christmas'.  This may be a challenge since I'm pretty sure Jesus was born in August and I don't buy the immaculate conception story line.  Details aside I do believe that Jesus existed and is an important historical figure.  Thankfully I have several church goers in my life who can assist me with this.

 All of this being said Rocco has changed the holiday season for me.  It has given me a new found sense of what it important.  Waking up to a happy, babbling baby is present enough for me.  Although I really do love my new indoor cycle shoes. 

Damnation!

You may want to sit down for this one.

Rocco is not being baptized.

Some of you may be thinking, 'Pssh...big deal'.  Others may may be gasping for air.  I'm sure there is someone somewhere rolling over in their grave.

Eric and I have talked about it and we are sticking with our decision.  We believe in God but we are not religious.  We believe that Rocco has a Higher Power.  But neither of us believe Rocco needs to be baptized to have a relationship with that Higher Power.

I was brought up Methodist.  I guess.  I was baptized as a baby.  Of course I have no recollection of the event and can say it was a pretty meaningless act. Eric was brought up in a Catholic church.  Kind of.  He was Christened and made his confirmation.  Neither of us identities with the religion of our childhood.  Both of us found a Higher Power in the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous and I bet our concept of God is much different than most.

Choosing a church would be our first problem.  Methodist or Catholic? And how hypocritical would it be for us to show up at a random church and ask them to perform this highly significant ceremony for a family they have never met?

To be baptized means to 'accept Christ' and to commit to living a Christian life.  I think that is alot to ask of a baby.  I hope to raise Rocco to be a good person.  Do the right thing. Tell the truth.  Help people.  But I'm hesitant to label that Christian. I don't think one needs to be Christian to be a decent human being.  And I want Rocco to make that decision for himself.  When he is old enough to understand what that means and responsible enough to carry that out.

My friend Brenda did not have her two children baptized as babies.  Yet this past year both Katrina and Matt decided that they wanted to be baptized.  They started to attend church with their aunt and decided that this was something important to them.  Both of them attended religious classes and have a full understanding of what they were doing.  Katrina is 13 or 14 years old and when I asked her about it she said she was glad she had the opportunity to do it when she was  older and it actually had meaning to her.

Some Christians believe you will go to hell if you are not baptized.  I do not believe in hell.  Problem solved.  I don't know if Rocco will believe in Heaven and Hell.  But if he does I do not believe his Higher Power would damn him to hell for not going through the motions of a baptism.

My hope is that Rocco does not believe in a punishing God.  That he is not fearful of God.  And I guess I have some authority over what he believes.  Eric and I plan to teach Rocco about God.  But just like Eric and I, Rocco has a Higher Power that is unique to him.  Maybe someday he will look for that God at church.  We will support that decision when the time comes.  And it should be his to make.

Ssssshhhhhh.....

People told me it couldn't be done.
'Good luck' they said.
Other mothers told me I was 'crazy' and rolled their eyes.
But thanks to The Baby Whisperer, Rocco has been sleeping through the night since he was about 3 months old.
Since we had such success with her philosophy and instructions on night time sleep, we plan on following her guide for nap time and potty training as well.

The Baby Whisperer is Tracy Hogg.  She is the author of three best selling books.  We own Secrets of the Baby Whisperer and The Baby Whisperer Solves All of Your Problems.   We first heard of Hogg from other new moms trying to figure out how to stay sane while raising an infant.  I ordered both books on ebay out of curiosity and desperation for a good nights rest.

Secrets of the Baby Whisperer helped us decode Rocco's body language and different cries.  We were better able to meet his needs once we were able to tell the difference between his hungry cry and gas pain wail.  Hogg promotes treating your baby with respect and learning how to communicate with them.    Hogg also talks about her EASY routine which stands for Eat, Activity, Sleep, and You time.  Following this routine helps the baby learn how to fall asleep with out having to nurse which can be troublesome when the baby gets older.  She believes that babies should sleep in their own beds and feel safe in that space.

The Baby Whisperer is the reason Rocco sleeps through the night.  I kept hearing from professionals that a four month old baby is able to sleep through the night.  I kept hearing from other mothers that babies can't sleep through the night.   I had come to realize that babies will not sleep through the night if you don't let them.  If you rescue them every time they cry you never find out whether or not they would have drifted back to sleep after a few minutes.  

I joked that I had 'baby behavior modification' to do.  But in reality that is exactly what The Baby Whisperer was suggesting.  I figured out that Rocco was what Hogg refers to as a 'habitual waker'.  A baby who wakes up when hungry will wake up at a different time every night.  A baby who wakes out of habit will wake at the same time every night.  Eric and I reinforced this habit.  Rocco woke up at 1am and again at 3am like clockwork for weeks.  We started by eliminating the 1am feed.  A few weeks later we eliminated the 3am feed.

It was difficult to do but so worth it.  Each elimination took three nights to change.  I used Hogg's 'shush/pat' method to comfort Rocco and let him know I was there.  I used a pacifier on these nights.  We only use the pacifier at night or during nap time.  Rocco will suck himself to sleep and then spit it out.

Rocco does have nights where he wakes up.  But he is never up for more than a few minutes.  It is usually gas pain or his teeth bothering him.  But we no longer respond to our son immediately with a boob or bottle.  We do not reinforce behavior that we do not want to continue.  We listen to him and are so much more in tune with who he is and what he wants thanks to The Baby Whisperer.

If I was able to stay home with Rocco I may have taken another approach to parenting.  But I only had 10 weeks at home with him.  And anyone who knows me knows that I enjoy sleep.  8 hours at night and a 2-3 hour nap during the day if possible.  Sleeping through the night was extremely important to me.

 

I'm pretty sure Eric thought I was crazy initially and he seemed somewhat irritated with the constant instructions I gave him.  But he is now reaping the benefits of a baby who sleeps for an eight hour stretch.

I'm pretty sure many of our friends and family thought I was crazy as well.  But I have an unusually happy kid.  He wakes up in a great mood and ends his day in that same happy demeanor.
Let them say what they want.
I will not lose any sleep over it.   

So much to blog about....so little time...

Hello Rocco Lovers!
It has been a long time since I have written.  We are tired.  Working on establishing a routine.  And when we have free time - we veg!
But just so you all don't think I have given up on this exciting forum dedicated to everyone's favorite little Fortuna I decided to write a little something.
There is so much to write about.  Future blog topics include but are not limited to:
     *Raising a vegetarian.  (No prosciutto for this Italian baby!)
     *Gun play (Unavoidable or not?)
     *Baptism (or in our case - a lack there of)
I'm sure you can't WAIT to hear my opinion on all of THESE topics!
But for now I will leave you with this...

Five Months Old.

Rocco is already five months old!
He weighed in at 18.1.  He has been gaining 2 lbs a month since birth.
He is 26.75 inches long.  His onsies hardly snap.  He is all torso!
Rocco has two teeth now.  He uses them to chew on rice crackers and unfortunately has a habit of chomping down while Mama is nursing him.
I can't believe how fast he is growing.  Each day he is so different and his personality shines through more.
His smile is contagious.
He is gearing up to crawl.  Right now he just scooches himself in a circle.

More Rocco to come....

Mama Must Haves

I was told before I had Rocco that I was going to need alot of 'stuff' for the baby.  Furniture, clothes, feeding tools, toys, etc.  Eric and I decided to register at Target (my favorite store) and the baby registry website had a list of items to guide you through the registry process.  I couldn't believe how much was on it and thought "We are never going to get all of this stuff and we are going to go broke preparing for this baby".

We got most of the essentials and were fortunate to have quite a bit of what we needed given to us.  We are not too proud for hand-me-downs (two changing tables, a jogging stroller, and a crib).  We also purchased several items at yard sales (exersaucer and walker).  I was able to buy most of what we needed with the generous gift card my coworkers gave me as a shower gift.  My parents gift to us (Rocco, really) was a mattress and travel system.  So, with a house full of baby gear we were ready to bring Rocco home.

The play room.  No longer this neat and organized.

We are five months into our parenting adventure and Eric and I have come to realize that the 'baby industry' is huge.  They bank on the fact that new parents want everything to be perfect.  They want to convince you that you need their products to ensure the safety of your child.  They want new moms and dads to feel like they have to have all of these accessories in order to be 'good' parents.  We knew this going into parenthood.  But as we make our way through Rocco's changing needs we see that most of what we were told we needed we actually did not.  So for those of you who are about to embark on this same adventure I thought I would let you know what I found to be a 'must have' and what I can do without.

My number ONE must have is the Boppy Pillow.  I use it for nursing.  I also used it for plopping Rocco down before he was able to roll over.  It is a perfect place to stick your newborn while you run to the bathroom.  I also put Rocco in it on the bathmat while I took a shower.  We still use it every day.  A regular pillow does not work as well for propping the baby on the boob.  And extra covers are highly recommended.

Tummy time on the Boppy.  Colorful slip cover.

Perfect for babies AND dogs

The second thing I can not live without is the play mat from Auntie Morgan.  I LOVE Infantino products.  They are super cute, colorful, and gender neutral.  Rocco has loved this thing from the very beginning.  And really, it is another great place to plop the baby in an emergency like when you need to refill your coffee cup.  It is lightweight and easy to transport.  It is also great for tummy time.  Not only does Rocco enjoy playing with the dangling animals.  He is mesmerized by the colorful patterns on the mat when he finds himself face down.

A very young Rocco on his play yard.

Rocco starts to notice the toys.

If your baby is gassy you need Mylicon or a generic version of this medication.  Target, Walmart, and Rite Aid all make versions of this same remedy at a fraction of the cost.  We give it to Rocco if he is super fussy after eating.  Usually within 30 minutes he is much calmer and is producing adult sounding farts.  It is kind of amusing to us but such a relief to him.

A gassy baby is an unhappy baby.

Since Rocco has started teething we are promoters of Hyland's Teething Tablets.  Rocco was so good while cutting his first tooth we didn't even notice it coming in.  However, this second tooth is giving him a hard time. His gums are red and puffy.  The poor boy constantly has his fingers in his mouth and he is super irritable.  These pills dissolve quickly and seem to give him relief immediately.  And I feel better about giving these to him than baby Tylenol.

I encourage every expecting or new mother to stock up on receiving blankets and skip the traditional burp cloth.  Dwell Studio has a line at Target stores with adorable prints.  The patterns are modern and funky and the blankets are larger than traditional receiving blankets which make it much easier to swaddle baby as he/she starts to grow and wiggle.  We go through several of them a day.  We keep them everywhere.  Sometimes I will do an entire laundry load of just receiving blankets.  Burp cloths are stupid.  Skip them.   They don't hold as much spit up as your baby will produce.

Rocco being burped with my favorite Dwell receiving blanket. 

Good for burping and napping.  Onsie by Dwell Studio for Target.

What you don't need?  Well...quite a bit.  You find that you make due with what you have.  We did not buy a baby wipe warmer or a bath water thermometer.  Rocco is surviving just fine.

We spent about $15 on a bottle drying rack.  They come in all different shapes and sizes.  There are quite a few to choose from so it seems like it must be something useful to have.  Yeah....no.  It does nothing that my normal dish rack does not already do.  And it takes up too much counter space.  Something I can't spare.  We use it because it is there.  But I wish we had spent the $15 on diapers instead.  

In my opinion the bouncy seat and swing do the same thing.  Keep the baby occupied for a few minutes while you try and wash dishes.  Therefore, I do not think you need them both.  I'm lucky both of mine were given to me so we do not have any money invested in them.  But I am sure alot of you do.  Rocco preferred the bouncy seat.  We still use the swing because it is there.  We keep it in the kitchen.  The bouncy seat goes all over the house with us because it is small and so lightweight.  Save your money and buy one. You will also be saving space!

Rocco naps in his bouncy seat while his big cousin stands guard

What is comes down to is the baby industry preying on a new parents fear and anxiety.  They know we want to raise happy, healthy babies and lead us to believe that we will not if we do not buy! buy! buy!  Think about how your parents raised you.  And how their parents raised them.  Diapers with sharp safety pins! Carriages without neck support or safety straps! Stuffed animals with bite sized plastic eyes!  We all survived.

And if you need a reminder of just how resilient babies are and how successful parents can be without all of the trinkets and gadgets rent the documentary Babies.  Those Mongolian babies do just fine without a Babies R Us.